


False Fronts and Happy Endings

by Laureloopy



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Aromantic Shirofuku Yukie, College AU, Demisexual Matsukawa Issei, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Homosexual Hanamaki Takahiro, M/M, Makki Mattsun and Yukie share an apartment, Makki is a hobbyist artist, Makki loves No. 6, No. 6 references, angsty but the ending is vv fluffy i promise, hanamaki is a cheesy lil shit, i call them the memefucks, its a gr8 way for him to get away with things and express himself, let's hear it for queerplatonic, no pre-knowledge of No. 6 is actually needed to read this fic, queerplatonic, some mentioned iwaoi but like very very little
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-20
Packaged: 2018-05-31 11:00:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6467563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laureloopy/pseuds/Laureloopy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hanamaki Takahiro can't tell you Where, When, Why or How he fell in love with his best friend. All he can tell you is Who - Matsukawa Issei - and What about him he fell in love with.</p><p>And he can also tell you that it really, really hurts to see someone you're in love with dating someone else.</p><p>[also known as how these two idiots finally got their shit together after about 2 years worth of pining and convincing themselves that the other could never think of them the same way. thanks, Yukie]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Smile Even Though You're Sad

**Author's Note:**

> This is based loosely off an idea that @indivx (on instagram) and I had for a college AU, so basically yeah, s/o to her cos she my bae
> 
> Not beta read, but I hope you enjoy anyway!

Hanamaki Takahiro would never have admitted it to anyone - because it would have completely thrown off his reputation of being a snarky, sassy meme lord - but he was someone who could be classified as a hopeless romantic. Much of his internal dialogue consisted of himself thinking sappy, cheesy things like “God, whenever Mattsun smiles at me I just feel so happy” or “Pfft, Mattsun’s hair is such a mess, it’s adorable” or even “Wait, Mattsun lets me sling my arm around his shoulders, but he’s not comfortable with other people doing it? Shit. Oh my god. Am I special?”

 

Oh, yeah. That’s right. He was also completely head over heels in love with his best friend, the one and only Matsukawa Issei.

 

He’d thought about it many times before. He’d asked himself on multiple occasions, “When did I start falling for Mattsun?”

 

The truth is, he had no idea. Out of the 5Ws and 1H that he’d asked himself, he found that he didn’t have an answer for Where, When, Why or How. All he knew was Who - Matsukawa Issei - and What.

 

What made him fall in love with Matsukawa Issei?

 

The truth was, Makki was someone who put a lot of value and importance on the smallest of things. Even since young, it’d sort of been a part of him to really treasure and value the small things. Every birthday, he found himself more touched by the fact that his family members took so much out of their spare time to set up a celebration for him than he was by the presents they got him. Every Christmas, it was legitimately actually the thought that counted for him - as cliche as that sounds - rather than the gifts he received.

 

Similarly, it was all the smallest things about Mattsun that made him fall in love with the boy.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s constantly half-lidded gaze, the way it looked so tired, uninterested and dull, but in truth hid a pair of sharp, intelligent blue-gray eyes, the colour of which were like the sea right before a thunderstorm; dark, deep, intense. The same eyes which he’d seen grow soft with fondness on many a team bonding occasion, the same eyes he’d seen brimming with tears, overwhelmed with emotion and frustration after the team’s loss to Karasuno in their final match of high school. He loved how Mattsun’s eyes provided a sort of window into his soul, one that he was always eager to look into. Makki remembered staying back after a practice session during their second year of high school with Mattsun, Iwaizumi and Oikawa so they could do some studying together. Makki had gotten bored after about 45 minutes, and abandoned all intentions of studying in favour of sketching Mattsun’s eyes in his sketchbook. 

 

When Mattsun finally noticed, he’d asked, “What are you doing?” To which Makki, bearing a wonderfully shit-eating grin, had replied, “Drawing a map.” 

 

“A map? But that looks like my eyes.”

 

“Yeah,” Makki said, “I often get lost in them.”

 

Mattsun had burst out laughing at that, and the wonderful sound of his deep laugh was broken only by the  _ I-can’t-believe-you _ groan that came from Iwaizumi and the whiny “Makkiii! That was awful!” from Oikawa.

 

Makki was fairly sure that it was eventually passed off as a joke, as it had been intended originally. But the more Makki thought about it, the more he realised that it wasn’t really a lie at all. Either way, his cover of practicing his art had been perfect, and nobody had questioned it.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s smile, the way his lips curved upwards at the corners and parted in the center to create a comfortable smirk that looked natural on him. Mattsun was not someone like Oikawa, who had dozens and dozens of different smiles, between which only Iwaizumi could differentiate and pick out the ones that were genuine. Mattsun only had a few smiles. They varied slightly depending on the situation, but the three basic smiles were Happy, Joking and Forced. Happy was the genuine grin that would stretch across his face when he was incredibly happy or pleased with a situation. Joking was that wonderful shit-eating smirk he would wear most of the time. The rarest of the three was Forced. Mattsun was not someone who liked to hide his true emotions. Unlike Oikawa, who would smile even when he wasn’t happy, just as long as other people could see him, Mattsun rarely ever forced a smile onto his face. When he was sad, or angry, or upset, he would show it. Makki hated seeing the Forced smile. It only showed up when Mattsun felt uncomfortable about something, and didn’t want to risk hurting the person on the receiving end of the smile. Makki hoped that he’d never be the recipient of a Forced smile.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s incredibly messy hair. How it never stayed in place, always stuck up in odd places, and how soft it felt between his fingers whenever he ruffled his hair. He loved that however hard Mattsun tried to keep it in place or comb it down, within two hours, it’d be a mess of curls all over again. It was unbelievably cute.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s voice. Deep, warm and smooth, it reminded him of velvet. His entire being felt so light whenever he was able to make Mattsun laugh that loud, uncontrollable laugh of his. It felt as if he’d accomplished something akin to solving world hunger.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s habit of picking at his fingernails whenever he was bored or distracted, or even when he was focussing really hard on something and didn’t realise he was doing it. It was adorable and endearing. Makki would constantly tease him about his exceedingly long fingernails, saying he needed to cut it just like he needed to cut the crap, and Mattsun would simply retort that his fingernails were only long in comparison to Makki’s, which were bitten and chewed down to blunt stubs.

 

He fell in love with Mattsun’s sense of humour, his ability to laugh at his own misfortunes, his arsenal of terrible puns and innuendos, the fact that he loved memes just as much as Makki, and that he was up for doing almost anything that would piss off their friends, so long as they did it together.

 

Hanamaki was in love with Matsukawa, and while it had taken him about 2 full years to come to this realisation and come to terms with it, he knew he was probably never going to do anything about it.

 

Thinking about it, he and Mattsun had been making passive-flirtatious comments to each other for years. He was pretty sure that they held no meaning to Matsukawa, but they were like little cherished memories for Hanamaki, ones that he would occasionally think back on and laugh about. But through the years of somewhat-flirtatiousness, no moves had been made by either party. Makki took it to assume that Mattsun had no romantic interest in him at all. It stung a little, but he took it in his stride. Plus, Mattsun was his best friend. Above all, Makki wanted it to stay that way. He didn’t want to confess because he was afraid of rejection. He was afraid that confession would bring about rejection, which would lead to them drifting further and further apart, until they were no longer friends.

 

Hanamaki didn’t think he could stand not being friends with Mattsun.

 

And maybe he was a coward for doing this, for not confessing, but he’d rather be safe than sorry.

 

After graduation, he and Mattsun had decided to go to the same college, unlike Oikawa and Iwaizumi. They decided to share an apartment in Tokyo, nearby the college they were going to attend. The landlord of the apartment had contacted them a few months before they moved in to let them know that they were going to be sharing the apartment with one other person - a girl by the name of Shirofuku Yukie. 

 

It’d been about a month since they moved in. Yukie told them that she used to be a manager for Fukurodani’s volleyball team. Makki and Mattsun had instantly grown fond of Yukie. She was chill, smart, hilarious, and she loved memes. The only downside was that she had a bottomless pit for a stomach. There was never enough food in the apartment, what with the amount of food that Yukie consumed on a daily basis.

 

That night was Friday - movie/TV night. Mattsun and Yukie still weren’t back from class yet, and Makki’d already ordered about 5 pizzas (3 of which were for Yukie) for dinner. Since no one else was home yet, nobody was around to object to him choosing to watch No. 6 again. (It was his favourite anime, so sue him. Nezumi was his fucking bae.) 

 

Almost an hour later, the pizzas had all arrived and were beginning to go cold. Makki was starting to worry about where Mattsun and Yukie were. Just as he pulled out his phone to dial Mattsun’s number, the front door opened with a click.

 

“So you two finally decided to drag your sorry asses back home?” he called, a teasing tone to his voice. “Ha-ha.” Mattsun called back.

 

Then the door opened fully.

 

And what Makki saw caused him to nearly drop his phone.

 

Grinning widely, Mattsun and Yukie held up their intertwined fingers and announced in sync, “We’re dating!”

 

Makki’s soul felt empty and there was a dull, painful ache in his chest. It throbbed with every beat of his heart.

 

Makki smiled. It felt like he was rubbing salt on an open wound.

 

“I’m happy for you.” he said, as he felt his heart shatter. “I’m so happy for you.”

 

No.

 

No, he wasn’t.


	2. Letting The Water Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, you cry alone. Sometimes, you need a shoulder to cry on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy heck thank you all so much for the comments! Ahh!  
> I've decided to extend the fic - it's going to be 3 chapters long in total, so the next chapter will be the last one! With any luck it'll be up by the weekend, but no promises.
> 
> Again, not beta read, so please excuse any mistakes! Hope you enjoy!

Hanamaki Takahiro was not okay.

 

He was many things at the moment, but okay was not one of them.

 

He watched as Mattsun fed Yukie another slice of pizza, watched as she rested her head on Mattsun’s lap, continued watching even as his heart throbbed dully and painfully in his chest.

 

Mattsun looked up, caught his eye and smiled.

 

And never before had Makki thought that a time would come in which he didn’t want to see such a genuine smile cross Mattsun’s face. 

 

_ “Stop it,” _ Makki chastised himself,  _ “Stop feeling so sorry for yourself. Mattsun’s your best friend and you should be happy for him no matter what. Buck up and stop being so pitiful. It’s not… It’s not like you ever had a chance, anyway…” _

 

Yet, he couldn’t stop the traitorous part of his brain that kept whispering,  _ “What if you did have a chance? What if there was a chance that Mattsun liked you? What if you missed your chance?” _

 

He couldn’t stop the part of him that kept whispering,  _ “You missed your chance, you missed your chance, you missed your chance…” _ on a loop, like a broken record. He wanted to laugh, because ‘broken’ sure felt like a fitting word right now.

 

His eyes drifted back to the TV screen, where No. 6 was still playing. He was bitterly amused by how he suddenly felt far more sympathetic towards Safu than he ever had before.  _ “Hopelessly in love with someone who’ll only ever view you as a friend, huh?” _ he mused,  _ “Yeah. Me too.” _

 

Makki knew that the initial shock was still setting in. He’d probably feel the full blow of the realisation later on, hopefully when he was alone. But for now… It was silent. It was strange to hear so little conversation in their apartment, which was usually bursting with noise. But it was a comfortable silence, Makki supposed. One that he didn’t feel like breaking in fear that once he opened his mouth, every single thought he was keeping tightly bottled up within him would just come spilling out. 

 

“So, when did you guys become a thing?”

 

Of course, he had to go and screw everything up by opening his mouth. Classic. Predictable, really.

 

Yukie grinned that lazy smile of hers up at him and said, “Oh, Mattsun approached me during lunch and just decided to ask me out. Nothing special, really,” she said, shooting Mattsun a look that Makki couldn’t quite read, but for whatever reason made Mattsun look away and blush slightly. “Isn’t that right, honeybun?” she teased. Mattsun stuck his tongue out at her and replied, “Only the truth, sweetie cakes.” as he playfully booped her nose.

 

Makki felt like he wanted to retch. He felt like he wanted to rip out his insides and stamp on them.

 

Instead, he smiled. He laughed. He could feel all the emotions swirling violently within him building up, about to reach a breaking point.

 

_ “Shit,” _ was Makki’s only rational thought when he felt the tears start to brim up behind his eyes.

 

Hurriedly, he stood up and faked a yawn, stretching and rubbing his eyes to cover up the tears threatening to fall. “Welp,” he proclaimed, “I’m turning in for the night. It’s been a real long day. See ya in the mornin’, lovebirds.” He flashed them a final tired grin, then climbed the stairs and retreated into his room. 

 

He waited until he’d shut the door, locked it, made his way over to his bed and fallen face-first onto the pillows before he let the tears spill out.

 

This hurt. It hurt so much more than he thought it would, it hurt so much more than he wanted it to, it hurt, it hurt, _ it hurt _ .

 

Makki clenched his fists into his bedsheets, gritting his teeth as sob after sob racked his body. He wanted to punch something. Wanted to kick something. He was filled with anger, frustration, self-pity and a bitter sense of amusement at the whole situation. Ironic, wasn’t it? People were supposed to be happy for their best friends when they found a partner, maybe even celebrate with them. And yet here he was, feeling utterly devastated, locked away in his own room and crying his eyes out because his best friend got himself a girlfriend.

 

Makki was angry, yes. But he realised with somewhat of a start that he wasn’t angry with Yukie at all - he was angry with himself. He couldn’t find it in him to blame it on Yukie, so he blamed it on himself. He was so, so angry with himself - for falling in love with his best friend, for being a coward, for not taking that chance and confessing. “Stupid,” he hissed through clenched teeth as he punched his left forearm. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.”

 

Makki tried to imagine how Mattsun would have reacted if he had been in Makki’s shoes.

 

Mattsun would have probably sucked it up and accepted it. As much as it may have hurt him, he would have probably done his best to push his feelings away so that he could genuinely be happy for him. Because that was Mattsun, and Mattsun had such a tendency to be selfless.

 

But Mattsun wasn’t the one in Makki’s shoes. Makki was. And Makki didn’t think he could ever measure up to Mattsun in that way - he’d always fall behind in that aspect.

 

Because this was Makki, and Makki was selfish. So he allowed himself to cry.

 

\----------

 

As soon as Mattsun heard the sound of Makki’s door closing, he hurriedly patted Yukie’s shoulder and whispered, “Yukes. D’you think it worked?”

 

Yukie sat up and shrugged. “I dunno man, but he seemed pretty convinced to me.” she reasoned, reaching over to grab another slice of pizza.

 

Mattsun let out a long sigh, before turning to Yukie with a raised eyebrow. “So, I asked you out during lunch and it was nothing special, was it?”

 

Yukie giggled, but the sound of it was muffled by the pizza in her mouth. She swallowed, before gently socking him in the shoulder. She flicked his forehead and said, “I saved your sorry ass during lunch, for which you are eternally in my debt, my  _ darling honeybun _ .” Her voice was dripping with sarcasm as she said the last two words.

 

Mattsun chuckled softly. It was true. Yukie had indeed saved his sorry ass earlier that day during lunch. That much, he couldn’t deny. 

 

_ [Earlier that day, during lunch] _ “Matsukawa-kuuun~!” Mattsun had stiffened and froze the moment he heard the high-pitched voice call out his name, accompanied by a cacophony of approaching footsteps on hardwood flooring. He took a deep, composing breath, before forcing a smile onto his face and turning around.

 

Almost immediately, he had found himself cornered against the wall by a group of about 6 to 7 energetic girls. He recognised one of them - Gankona Megumi from his History class. She must have been the one who had called out his name earlier. She was moving extremely close, far too close for comfort. “Y-yes, Gankona-san?” he spluttered. She reached up and twirled a loose lock of her hair around her finger. “Matsukawa-kun! My friends and I were really curious… Are you single? Also… What type of girl are you into?” 

 

_ “Shit.” _

 

Mattsun was starting to panic. This was different from all the previous times that he had been approached by girls. So far, it had only been “Matsukawa-san, I like you! Please go out with me!” or “Matsukawa-san, I’m in love with you! I hope you can return my feelings!” or other confessions similar to those. But that’s what they had all been - confessions. Simple enough to turn down, though Mattsun always felt bad about hurting the girls who had been brave enough to confess their feelings to him. Nobody had ever asked him directly if he was single.

 

Matsukawa Issei hated to lie. It was not something that he did naturally, neither was it something that he enjoyed doing. It just felt wrong to him. Mattsun was someone who tried his best to be completely honest in nearly all aspects of his life. 

 

But Matsukawa Issei was also someone who hated being ‘different’. He hated standing out in a crowd, he always tried to blend in and not stick out. In some way, he could be considered a people-pleaser, in that he always tried to fall into the norm of the majority.

 

With two such strong, conflicting traits programmed into his code, there were of course multiple times when they would come head-to-head.

 

This was one of those times.

 

_ “Tell them the truth!” _ his Honest side yelled,  _ “Tell them you’re single, and that you’d never date them because you’ve never been into girls or anyone that you don’t know well! Tell them that your type is someone who has broad shoulders, pale creamy skin, narrow almond-shaped eyes, short-cropped strawberry blond hair, a shit-eating grin, a great sense of humour, is 184.7cm tall, weighs 72kg, was born on the 27th of January, lives in the same apartment as you and has been your best friend for over 3 years! Tell them!” _

 

_ “No!” _ argued his Conformative side,  _ “Don’t let them know that you’re any different from the other boys! Make something up! You can’t always be honest, that’s just impossible! You can’t let them know the truth!” _

 

Mattsun felt like he was ready to scream from all the conflicting thoughts racing through his head when out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of a neon yellow and silver letterman-style jacket and a head of pinkish-brown hair. There were only a few people on campus who could possibly own a jacket like that, and only one of which had hair of that colour.

 

“Yukie!” 

 

Mattsun’s voice sounded strained when it came out of his throat, but it didn’t matter. She had heard him. He gestured for her to come over.

 

“‘Sup?” she asked as she neared. Mattsun reached out and grabbed her by the shoulder, yanking her closer. Trying his very best to look composed and collected, he smiled and said, “Sorry girls, but I’m not single. This is my girlfriend, Yukie.” He squeezed her shoulder tightly, trying to somehow convey the message  _ “Just go with it.” _

 

She got the message. “Yeah, sorry about that, girls. This one’s mine.” Yukie confirmed with a wink. About half of the girls in the group let out a sigh or groan, while the other half gasped in excitement. Mattsun could tell that they were absolutely dying to let everybody know about the wonderful new information they’d gained.

 

Yukie very gently pushed Gankona away and said, “Now run along, darling.” As one, the entire group ran off, gossiping loudly among themselves. Once they were out of earshot, Yukie cleared her throat and turned around to face Mattsun with an expectant look on her face.

 

“So,” she prompted.

 

“So…” Mattsun mumbled. He looked over Yukie’s shoulder, not wanting to meet her eyes.

 

There was silence for a few seconds, before Yukie let out a sigh. “Come on, Mattsun, spill the beans. What was that about? It’s not like you to lie so blatantly. Mattsun… You can trust me.”

 

And that was all it took. Mattsun let out a deep, shuddering breath and whispered, “Yukie, I’m trusting you with this, okay. Please, please don’t let anyone else know-”

 

“Not even Makki?” the surprise in her voice was audible.

 

Mattsun bit his lip and looked to the side for a brief moment. When he turned back to her, his eyes were pleading and vulnerable. Yukie was slightly shocked. She’d never seen Mattsun like this before. “Especially not Makki.” he said, and the meaning was made completely clear. She gave him a tight nod in response. 

 

Mattsun took a deep breath, then whispered, “I’m gay.” He closed his eyes, bowed his head and waited for her response.

 

“What’s so bad about that?”

 

“Huh?” Mattsun looked up, eyes wide. He had not been expecting that response. He’d been expecting “WHAT?!” or “Are you sure about that? Maybe you haven’t found the right girl yet.” or even “Oh my god. Get away from me.” He definitely hadn’t expected Yukie to be okay with it so quickly.

 

“Did you… I just- I just told you I’m gay, did you not-”

 

“Yeah, Mattsun, I heard, and I’m asking you what you think is so bad about that. What are you so afraid of?” Mattsun looked at Yukie, and her facial expression told him that she wasn’t trying to be insensitive - she was genuinely curious. He sighed. “I don’t know, really.” he admitted. “I just… I don’t want to risk being singled out and picked on because people know I’m different. I don’t want my classmates and friends to turn from me in disgust because they think I’m some dick-loving pervert. ‘N fact, I’m a little surprised by how you had such an okay reaction to it.”

 

“Oh,” interrupted Yukie, “It’s cause I’m queer too! I’m asexual and aromantic. Believe me when I say I’ve done my research, dude. And I dunno, man, but I don’t see any reason why I should be disgusted by people who like the same gender, or more than one gender, or all the genders, or whatever! I mean, we’re all human beings, right? What’s the diff?”

 

Mattsun felt a wave of relief wash through him. “Thank god.” he sighed, sagging over and resting his weight on Yukie. She let out a small sound of protest, then suddenly gasped. “Oh my god. Mattsun. Idea idea idea.” she said, whacking him on the back multiple times to emphasize her point. “Ow,” he complained, standing up again. She shushed him.

 

“Mattsun, listen. We should actually legit pretend we’re dating. I mean it’s the perfect cover! Everyone’ll think you’re straight, _ and _ taken, so nobody’s gonna pick on you for being gay and girls’ll stop asking you out. Everyone’s gonna think I’m taken too, so guys’ll stop hitting on me! It’s fucking brilliant!” she proclaimed.

 

“Holy shit,” Mattsun said, “You’re right.”

 

So it had been agreed right then and there, in the middle of an otherwise empty school hallway during lunch break, that Shirofuku Yukie and Matsukawa Issei would officially begin Fake Dating™.

 

“Hey, Mattsun.” Mattsun was broken out of his reverie by the sound of his name. “Yeah?” he asked.

 

“You don’t gotta answer this if you aren’t comfortable with it, but… How did you know? That you were gay?” Yukie looked like she had been deep in thought as well, up to that point in time.

 

Mattsun sucked in a breath. “Oh.” he breathed. “Well…”

 

He closed his eyes and gestured for Yukie to come closer. He felt her weight shift on the sofa until the warmth of her leg was pressed gently against his. He took a deep breath, then opened his eyes and mumbled, “Makki.”

 

“Makki?” asked Yukie. There was no surprise in her voice, and the word sounded more like she was prompting him to continue rather than asking for confirmation.

 

“Makki.” he breathed. “Just- everything about him, the way he smiles, the sound of his laugh, that habit he has of biting his nails and chewing on his lips, his strange love for No. 6, the fact that he likes to draw in his free time, his sarcasm, his sense of humour, his hair, god, I love his hair, how completely fucking cute he looks when he’s wearing his reading glasses, just- Everything.”

 

Matsukawa was baring his soul, his innermost thoughts and feelings to this girl whom he’d come to trust so deeply and so fully in just the span of one day. He’d known her for about a month, but in just this one day, their relationship had become so much more than just that of flatmates. They had become friends. Real friends, ones that could be trusted with each other’s deepest secrets. He was so incredibly thankful for Yukie.

 

“And also,” he continued, “The fact that I’ve never ever felt any sort of attraction to a girl. Not once ever before. Never. But then again, I’ve never actually felt attraction to any guys either, apart from Makki. Makki’s the only one. Plus, the attraction wasn't there from the very beginning. I only really felt anything apart from platonic love towards him after knowing him for about 2 years. So I’m not so sure what’s up with that-”

 

“Maybe you’re demisexual.” interrupted Yukie. “Meaning you only feel sexual attraction towards people you have a deep, emotional bond with. Or something to that effect. Makki’s your best friend, right? So yeah, that could be a possibility.”

 

Mattsun nodded. He fell silent. He didn’t want to admit it, but it had hurt him more than it should have to see that Makki was completely okay with him dating Yukie. Of course, hoping for any other reaction was a far stretch. He’d known beforehand that the chances of Makki liking him back were extremely low. 

 

“Mattsun - why don’t you tell him?”

 

The laugh that came out from Mattsun’s throat was dry and bitter. “Why do you think, Yukie? He’ll hate me. And… It’ll hurt him. It’ll hurt him to know that his best friend is totally in love with him, because… Because that’s just so uncomfortable isn’t it? Knowing that someone so close to you loves you in a way that’s completely different from how you love them. It’s- It’s better for him if he doesn’t know. It’ll hurt him less. I just- It- It’s just completely hopeless.”

 

Mattsun didn’t realise he was crying until he felt Yukie reach up and wipe away the tears that were running down his cheeks. He felt her wrap her arms around him and whisper “shhhhh” gently, providing him comfort and a safe place. 

  
He choked out, “Thank… You…” as he buried his face in his hands and allowed himself to be weak, just for a while, as he allowed himself to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohoho angst angst angst  
> so much foreshadowing in this chapter golly gee whiskers, also I sincerely hope that I was able to effectively make you all not hate Yukie because she's a queen pls don't hate her she's wonderful
> 
> Also: Gankona Megumi, 頑固な 愛. 'Gankona' is (according to Google Translate) the direct translation of the word 'stubborn'. Megumi (there are two different kanji for Megumi, the other means favour, benefit) means love, affection.
> 
> This is actually the longest chapter I've ever posted (2968 words!!) so I hope it was up to standard throughout!  
> (also, the biggest hint I'm going to give you about how this ends: look at the title of the fic, that's a huge tip)


	3. A Lifetime Of Laughter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, just sometimes, your biggest mistake could be the best thing you've ever done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gaAAAHH I'm super sorry for the long wait between chapters! (School's been kicking my butt)
> 
> I hope you enjoy the final chapter of False Fronts And Happy Endings!

Three weeks. 

 

Hanamaki Takahiro had watched Mattsun and Yukie being a completely lovey-dovey couple for three. Weeks. Straight.

 

(Ha. Pun fully intended, because making fun of the situation in his head was the only way Makki could even use to cope anymore.)

 

Three weeks of hearing “honeybun” and “sweetie cakes”, three weeks of daily handholding between Mattsun and Yukie, three weeks of absolute torture, wanting nothing more than to be in her place.

 

He wasn’t sure how much more of it he could take. 

 

\- - - 

 

Three weeks.

 

Matsukawa Issei had been fake dating Shirofuku Yukie for three. Weeks. Straight.

 

(Ha. Painfully ironic, because straight wasn’t what he was at all.)

 

It was easy to make it their relationship look convincing - Yukie had no concept of personal space whatsoever, and they were both salty enough to continually call each other “honeybun” and “sweetie cakes”. Yukie was mainly in it for the food - having a ‘boyfriend’ meant that she could get even more food and be even lazier about it by making him feed her.

 

It was all going well. Except for one not-so-small detail.

 

It was happening gradually, little-by-little, but Mattsun could tell. Of course he could tell, because it was Makki and he was very observant, especially when it had to do with Makki.

 

Slowly but surely, Makki was making himself more and more distanced from Mattsun.

 

Before the Fake Dating started, Mattsun used to spend so much time with Makki. In the mornings, he’d wake up to find Makki already awake and more likely than not, making coffee. They used to eat breakfast together, talking about nothing in particular, just to hear each other’s voices. Yukie would join them on some days. But now, by the time Mattsun was up, Makki had either already left or was already grabbing something light that he would bring with him and eat on his way to class. They used to spend evenings together, going for runs around campus, or studying together in the school library, or just chatting about anything at all in a cafe. Now, Makki’d always leave for runs without telling him, or go to the library by himself, or even just lock himself in his room. They used to spend weekends having so much fun, just enjoying each other’s company, doing anything at all. But now Makki would sleep in all day, or make up some lame excuse whenever Mattsun asked him if he wanted to go do something.

 

It hurt.

 

This was not at all how Mattsun had wanted it to go. In fact, he’d wanted the exact opposite.

 

He’d started fake dating Yukie so that Makki would never find out that he was gay, because Makki discovering his true feelings for him would more likely than not lead to Makki trying to distance himself from him. He’d agreed to the fake dating because he thought that it would keep Makki from drifting away.

 

It had backfired. Oh, how badly it had backfired.

 

\- - - - -

 

It was 6:28pm on Friday night. Movie night. Makki used to look forward to Friday nights because they were fun, they meant being able to stay up late watching some movie or an anime or rewatching No. 6 for the 8365621092th time.

 

Now they were something he dreaded and tried to avoid at all costs. 

 

He didn’t particularly enjoy subjecting himself to Yukie draping herself over Mattsun’s lap and watching Mattsun feed her snacks.

 

So, as a result of which, he was all dressed up, laptop, headphones and wallet in his bag, phone in his pocket, getting ready to leave. His plan was to go down to the nearest cafe (which he happened to know was open til 1:15am), find a good table and stay there til closing time, at which point he would head back up and hope that Mattsun and Yukie had gone to sleep by then.

 

He grabbed his reading glasses, put them on hurriedly and opened the door to his room, ready to leave.

 

He did not expect to see Mattsun standing directly outside, hand poised as if he had been about to knock.

 

“GaAAaahH! Mattsun! Holy shit, you scared the crap out of me.” Makki wheezed. He was breathing hard and his heart was beating really fast. It felt like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have been doing.

 

Mattsun took a step back in surprise, clearly not having expected Makki to open the door right before he was going to knock. 

 

Mattsun took in Makki’s outfit. Glasses, an unbuttoned creamy-beige cardigan over a white shirt with the words “Shrek is love, Shrek is life” printed on it in fancy cursive font, a pair of skinny blue jeans. Carrying a tote bag with Pepe the frog printed on it. Looking suspiciously guilty.

 

Mattsun raised an eyebrow. “You’re going out? But it’s Friday night. Movie night. You… do remember that, right?”

 

Makki sweated nervously. He blurted, “I uh, I didn’t feel like intruding in you and Yukie’s couple time! Yeah, uh, that’s it! I was uh, just gonna go down to the cafe for a while, you know, finish up a couple of assignments. Plus that way I could… you know, give you guys a little, heh, alone time. Without me around to bug you. So, yeah, if uh, you could excuse me...” The tips of Makki’s ears were pink, as well as the back of his neck, both warm from embarrassment.    
  


Mattsun frowned. “Bug us? What gave you that idea? Hey-” Makki was already pushing his way past Mattsun and making big strides towards the front door. “Hey, Makki! Makki, wait!” Just as Makki opened the front door, about to leave, Mattsun grabbed hold of Makki’s right wrist and held him back.

 

“Mattsun, what are you doing? Lemme go!” Makki said, after trying to get himself free from Mattsun’s iron grip and failing.

 

“No!” Mattsun yelled back. “I’m not fucking letting go until you explain!”

 

“Explain what?!” Makki yelled, feeling increasingly desperate to leave.

 

“EXPLAIN WHY THE HELL YOU’VE BEEN AVOIDING ME!”

 

There was stone silence in the apartment for about 20 stunned seconds. Even Yukie, who’d been eating popcorn on the couch, stopped completely.

 

A strained laugh from Makki broke the silence.

 

“Heh,” he said, voice thick with so many emotions that Mattsun could barely identify, “Explain? You want me to explain?”

 

With strength that Mattsun didn’t realise he had, Makki ripped his hand out of Mattsun’s grasp. He turned and looked directly into Mattsun’s eyes. Mattsun was shocked by how full of emotion they were. All the anger, sadness, guilt and frustration that had built up within Makki throughout those past 3 weeks had finally reached a breaking point. And Makki had snapped.

 

“Oh, I’ll fucking explain,” he hissed, “I’ll explain because it’s not like you’re ever gonna have to experience how goddamn painful it is to watch from the sidelines as the person you’ve gone and STUPIDLY fallen HEAD OVER FUCKING HEELS FOR gets himself a girlfriend and is COMPLETELY SMITTEN WITH HER 24/7! IT’S NOT FAIR! I CAN’T EVEN BE MAD AT YUKIE, BECAUSE NONE OF THIS IS HER FAULT, I CAN’T EVEN BE MAD AT YOU BECAUSE YOU HAD ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE ABOUT ANY OF THIS!”

 

Yukie let out a shaky gasp, but Makki didn’t even seem to have heard it.

 

“I hate it so much! I hate that I was a stupid coward who never had the guts to tell you, I hate that seeing the two of you together hurts me so much, I hate that I was stUPID ENOUGH TO GO AND FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU!”

 

Mattsun sucked in a sharp breath. He could hardly even breathe.

 

All of a sudden, Makki slapped his hands over his mouth. His eyes were blown wide and there were tears streaming down his cheeks. “Fuck,” he said softly, his words muffled by his hands. “I ruined everything.”

 

And then, he turned tail and fled. He dropped his bag carelessly on the floor, flung the half-open door fully ajar and ran.

 

Mattsun stood, unmoving, for almost 5 seconds, before he was jolted back to reality by a piercing “MATTSUN!!”

 

He whipped his head around. Yukie had a desperately urgent look on her face as she pointed out the door and yelled, “WHAT THE  _ FUCK _ ARE YOU WAITING FOR? GO AFTER HIM!  _ NOW!! _ ”

 

That was all the urging Mattsun needed. Without another thought, he took off after him.

 

\- - - 

 

Makki ran.

 

He didn’t know where he was going, all he knew was that he needed to get far, far away. He ran down the stairs to the first floor, then just ran in the direction of the other buildings. After about 2 minutes of full-out sprinting, he allowed himself to slip into a little alleyway between two buildings. Leaning his back against one of the walls, he stopped to finally catch his breath.

 

“Great going, Takahiro,” he whispered to himself, “Now he knows, now Yukie knows, oh god oh god you screwed up, how are you going to live with them from now on? It’ll be so awkward, fuck… You screwed up.”

 

He sighed, then sank to the ground. “Mattsun probably hates me now.” he mumbled, burying his face in his arms.

 

“I wouldn’t be too sure… About that…” said an all-too-familiar voice, breathing hard, and Makki whipped his head up in shock.

 

“M-Matsukawa!” he gasped, taking in the sight of the curly-haired boy panting hard to catch his breath, standing in the entrance to the alley. Makki turned to look at the other side - a dead end. Shit. He was trapped.

 

Makki scrambled to his feet while Mattsun was still catching his breath and tried to make a dash for it. But he’d forgotten how fast Mattsun’s reflexes were. The taller boy’s arm shot out and clamped tightly onto Makki’s right arm, then somewhat forcefully pulled him backwards and pinned him against the wall. Makki winced painfully when he felt the air being knocked out of his lungs at the force of the sudden impact. Then there was a shifting of weight, and Makki felt the warmth and pressure from Mattsun’s hand being lifted off his arm. He opened his eyes again-

 

And suddenly he could barely breathe because Mattsun was so close, just a few centimetres away, leaning into his personal space and practically pinning him against the wall. Mattsun’s hands were braced against the wall on either side of Makki’s head, and he was so close that Makki could feel the warmth radiating off his skin. They’d been closer before - hell, they’d hugged - yet somehow this time, the proximity was making Makki’s head spin.

 

Feeling overwhelmed, Makki blurted, “Mattsun?” His cheeks flushed pink as Mattsun stared deep into his eyes.  _ “God, those eyes…”  _ Makki felt as though they could somehow see through him, see every secret he kept bottled up within him, see into the deepest, darkest depths of his soul. And yet, he couldn’t look away. There was silence for a while, and all they did was stare into each other’s eyes. Then, Mattsun pulled his gaze away and cleared his throat.

 

“Listen, Makki,” he said, his voice just slightly softer than usual, “I’m not very good at this kind of thing. I just- I don’t really know what to say, or how to put it into words, but-”

 

“Mattsun, stop.” Makki cut in, tone resigned and devoid of emotion, “I get it, okay? I know what you’re trying to say.”

 

“Huh? Wait, n-”

 

“I get it, you love me too, but not in that way. You love me just as a friend.”

 

“No, Makki, wait, that’s not what I-”

 

“-and you’re really sorry, but you can’t return my affections, and you probably feel really uncomfortable around me now, and maybe I should consider finding another place to live where you won’t have to see me every day, and-”

 

And all of a sudden Makki couldn’t talk anymore because there was a pair of lips on his. 

 

Mattsun’s lips.

 

Mattsun was kissing him.

 

_ Mattsun was kissing him. _

 

_ Matsukawa fucking Issei was kissing him. _

 

And Makki was so surprised that all he could do was stand there with his eyes blown wide and mouth slightly open as he watched Mattsun pull away with a smile. “Sorry,” Mattsun apologised, voice tinged with amusement, “You wouldn’t let me say what I wanted to say, so I figured doing that was the only way to get you to shut up and listen.”

 

Upon seeing the classic smirk curve across Mattsun’s lips after he said that, Makki was yanked back into reality. If the intense warmth of his cheeks was any indication, Makki was fairly sure that his entire face was about the same colour as a tomato. 

 

“So, like I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me,” Mattsun said, grinning when Makki swatted at him in embarrassment, “I’m not really good with this kind of thing. But I, ah, I seem to remember Shion saying something that kind of sums up what I’m trying to say here. Something along the lines of…  _ “I’m attracted to you.” _ Did I get that right?” Makki sucked in a sharp, shuddering gasp, and Mattsun couldn’t help the stupid grin that spread across his face at the pink-haired boy’s reaction. “Yes,” Makki breathed, “Yeah, you- you got it.” 

 

Then Makki seemed to remember something. “But- wait, hang on, Mattsun. What about Yukie? I don’t- If you like me, then what about her? Why were you dating her?” Mattsun immediately looked away from Makki’s face and scratched the back of his head. He laughed awkwardly. “Ah, about that… We weren’t actually dating. We were never actually going out, it was, uh, how do I put this... We were fake dating. So… Heh heh. Surprise?” 

 

“WHAT?!” Makki yelled. Mattsun winced. “So you’ve been lying to me this entire time?! Why did you do that?!” Mattsun looked down, not wanting to meet Makki’s eyes. He mumbled, “Because I was afraid that if you found out the truth - that your best friend was completely, hopelessly, utterly in love with you - it’d hurt you more than it would if I just got myself a girlfriend and pretended to be straight. And you getting hurt - or worse, distancing yourself from me - was the last thing I ever wanted.”

 

There was silence for a while, in which neither boy said a word. Then, Makki muttered under his breath, “Completely fucking beautiful dork.” before he reached up, fisted his hands into the collar of Mattsun’s shirt and pulled him down to meet his lips in another kiss.

 

Matsukawa’s eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of Makki’s lips on his. The earlier kiss had been its own kind of spectacular, but this one was the first real kiss that they were sharing. The already-awake butterflies in his stomach broke into frenzied somersaults and his whole body felt incredibly light. The joy and relief flooding through his veins was enough to make him want to shout in elation. He was in love with his best friend. God, he was so, so in love with his best friend, and his best friend loved him back.

 

_ Hanamaki Takahiro loved him back. _

 

Hanamaki felt like he could burst from the overwhelming rush of happiness and affection that filled him as Mattsun wrapped his arms around him. He could barely believe it. He’d wanted this so much, he’d wanted this for so, so long, god how he’d wished and hoped for even the slightest chance that Mattsun might return his feelings. And he did.  _ He did, he did, he did! _

 

Mattsun’s lips were slightly chapped, and Makki’s tasted lightly of cherry lip balm, and they slotted together so perfectly. It just felt so  _ right _ . After a while, they realised that they were smiling too much to even kiss each other properly, so instead they just stood there, arms wrapped tightly around each other, foreheads pressed together and wearing two of the biggest, stupidest, most completely-in-love grins in the world. And they couldn’t even bring themselves to care that they were still in the middle of an alley between two buildings somewhere in the general vicinity of campus, couldn’t even bring themselves to care that their faces were wet with tears of joy and relief, couldn’t even bring themselves to care about anything at all apart from themselves and how wonderful it felt to be able to finally hold and kiss each other, after desperately pining for months, maybe even years.

 

It was a mess, they were a mess, but none of that mattered. All that mattered to them in that moment was each other.

 

“I love you.” Hanamaki whispered, as he buried his face in the crook of Mattsun’s neck.

 

“I love you too.” Matsukawa sighed, as he placed a soft kiss on top of Makki’s head and hugged him impossibly closer.

 

_ Yes. _

 

_ Finally. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's the final chapter of False Fronts And Happy Endings! Once again, I apologise for the super long wait between the previous chapter and this one! I hope you enjoyed the fic!
> 
> Also wHOOPS there's the fluff you all knew the fluff was coming 
> 
> I may or may not actually write an epilogue of sorts. If I do, it'll just be about what happened after these two cheesy dorks get their asses back up to the apartment and Yukie's reaction to everything. I just kinda feel like I left Yukie hanging lmao whoops but ok just so you know, Yukie completely 120% endorses MatsuHana and it has her stamp of approval af
> 
> feel free to hmu on tumblr @gixxa or on insta @gixxa_draws!!

**Author's Note:**

> finally my angst abilities are being put to use muahahahahaha
> 
> (ps the chapter names are lyrics from Death Of A Bachelor just because)  
> Look out for the next chapter, coming your way real soon~
> 
> ha ha i cant write


End file.
